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Hello Lovelies and welcome to this “What’s Your Kink?” post!
Today, we are going to be taking a deep dive into the wonderful world of pegging!
I’ve ummed and ahhed about writing this post for a while as it’s not something I’ve done in a long time (Master Levi isn’t into it, and I totally respect that!), but seeing how often it comes up on the Lovehoney Forum, I decided that it deserved its own “What’s Your Kink?” page. There are maybe two other pages in this series that I want to write soon too, so watch out for those!
Alright, let’s get down to business…
What is pegging?
Pegging is the penetration of a (typically man’s, though anyone can enjoy it!) anus with a dildo and strap-on harness. It is as an act of Domination and submission, as well as for sexual pleasure.
Why might someone be into pegging?
For the pegger it symbolises Domination, but more than that it’s symbolic of the deep trust that the peggee gives, which is essential in BDSM. Psychologically you are penetrating the most vulnerable part of someone, both emotionally and anatomically — that’s not a small thing!
For the peggee it is twofold: first, the deep sense of submission that a submissive feels when they are pegged. I’m going to talk namely about men here as that has been my experience and it is usually men who are into pegging, though again, absolutely anyone can enjoy it. You are allowing one of the most vulnerable and forbidden parts of you — your anus — to be penetrated. That can feel like a very submissive thing!
Secondly, the anus is very sensitive and packed with nerve endings. Some people can enjoy orgasms from anal and prostate stimulation, and pegging can be a powerful way for them to achieve that — or for Dominants to help them achieve that.
How did you discover you were into pegging?
I used to have a male submissive who enjoyed being pegged, so that was something we used to explore together. I was really hesitant to try it at first as it felt so unnatural, but I found that it unlocked a dominance within me. I loved showing a man how it felt to be fucked, and fucked so hard that you have to brace against the furniture to stay upright. That sounds really awful I know but… well, that was the kink for me!
Obviously pleasure is important too. I didn’t peg people who weren’t up for it!
Share with us a hot memory featuring pegging.
As I’m no longer involved with my partner and he can’t give consent to me sharing, out of respect for him I’m going to withhold on this one — sorry!
Do you have a favourite toy for pegging?
Not anymore because, as I said, Master Levi isn’t into it. A good harness is always a good investment though, and it’s worth investing in one with a little bit extra padding — pleasure for them need not be pain for you!
What advice would you give to someone getting into pegging?
Start slow, and it should be obvious, but begin with anal training. Begin with an anal training kit designed to help you gradually stretch the anal sphincter, don’t just dive in and… well, you know.
Look for lubricants specifically designed for anal sex. Some contain ingredients that help relax the body, making pegging more pleasurable for you both. Silicone lubricants also tend to last longer than water-based varieties, making them better for anal sex. Just don’t use a silicone-based lubricant with a silicone dildo, as it can damage them.
Invest in an enema kit. You know what comes out of the butt, right? You want to be going in as clean as possible. Always use warm (but not boiling water), and don’t use soap. It might not be the most glamorous part of preparation, but using an enema beforehand can make the experience far more comfortable and relaxed for everyone involved.
Some people like to use condoms on their dildos to make clean-up easier (or if you have multiple partners), but that’s up to you. Discuss it with your partner and decide whether that’s something you want to do.
Did I mention going slow? The anus is very delicate, and going too hard and fast can cause tears, pain, infection and bleeding. Go slow, use lots of lubricant, and only pick up the pace if the receiving partner wants to and is ready. To that end, don’t forget your safeword!
Find a position that is comfortable for you. There’s no universal “pegging position”, though many people default to doggy-style. Try it if that works for you, but don’t be afraid to get creative. Why not try one of the positions from our Sex Position Reviews?
How do you make pegging work, as a disabled person?
Again, I don’t engage in pegging anymore, but the main piece of advice I would give is to be careful with conditions that affect the bowels and rectum — some people find anal sex helps their symptoms, but others find it makes their symptoms worse.Maybe seek medical guidance prior to proceeding — I know it’s an uncomfortable conversation, but I promise you, as a former medical administrator, there is nothing that can shock us.
Also again, on the topic of positions, take physical needs into consideration. If the pegged partner requires support to stay in position, you may find it helpful to use a wedge or a couple of pillows.
That’s it from me for this post. Have you tried pegging before? Leave a comment below or read more of my What’s Your Kink? Posts!
Are you new to the world of BDSM? Be sure to check out our free Guide to BDSM here!
Until next time.
Stay safe & have fun,
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