Ten Shades & Me

Real lives. Real relationships. Real kink.

A woman kneels with her head bowed and her hands tied with red rope strung from above her. Immage suggests bondage, BDSM.

30 Days Of Submission: Day 21 – Positions Of Submission

Is there a physical position that makes you feel most submissive?

Yes, and I use the same position for meditation, too. For me, the best position to feel submissive is the Gorean “Nadu” position; knelt on the floor or the bed, back straight, knees apart, palms open on my thighs facing upwards, head up, gaze down. Even if I haven’t been trained, or have an interest in the Gorean subculture in itself, this is the position most familiar to those who practice the ubmissive lifestyle.. I suppose really, it comes down to psychological “anchoring” (I know, really boring stuff!) with “Nadu” being the most popular and known BDSM slave position. For me, the palms facing upward and open also suggests an openness to new experiences and learning in my submission, but maybe it’s just me!

“Nadu” with bad knees!

One of the biggest problems I face in my submission is that kneeling for long periods of time, hurts. I have chronic pain in my right knee, and so kneeling is something that I can only hold for 5-10 minutes at a time. Ff you really insist on kneeling with bad knees though, here are a few tips that you can to try:

  • Invest in a kneeling mat or cushion – N, not like you’d use in the home. I used to have a black velvet kneeling cushion for use during our sessions. If it’s the hard floor that’s causing you pain, having something soft beneath your kneecaps can help.
  • Kneel on the bed instead – There’s no hard and fast rule that says a submissive has to kneel on the floor. If the floor isn’t practical, try the bed instead.
  • Practice often, building your time up with each practice. The first time, you may only be able to kneel for two or three minutes. With regular practical, you may be able to build that time up even longer. If you can, try being mindful of the pain but not giving it too much attention. If it distracts you, notice it, then gently bring your focus to your submission to your Dominant instead.
  • Warm up ahead of a session – Okay, so not the most sexiest thing you’ve ever done, but then real sex isn’t always like they make it look in the movies anyway. If stiff joints are your problem, try some gentle stretches to loosen up your knees before kneeling.
  • Keep the time period short – Sorry to all of the Doms out there, but you may just have to be a bit flexible yourself. If your submissive partner has bad knees, don’t expect them to kneel for too long. A little pain in a BDSM session can be a good thing, hobbling your partner for the rest of the week, though, is not.
  • Finally, don’t forget to help your partner back up – I know, I know, you want to be seen as all tough and strict and brooding, but what’s really sexy? That tough guy or girl that shows they still have softer part inside. It makes us go all melty in the middle ourselves. Swoon!

Until next time!

Stay safe & have fun,

My diugital signature, all rights reserved


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2 responses to “30 Days Of Submission: Day 21 – Positions Of Submission”

  1. […] for how I handle my submission, I wrote in my last 30 Days Of Submission‘ that I use my same position for meditation and submission, and this is exactly how I cope […]

  2. […] for how I handle my submission, I wrote in my last 30 Days Of Submission‘ that I use my same position for meditation and submission, and this is exactly how I cope […]

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