Ten Shades & Me

Real lives. Real relationships. Real kink.

A jeweled gold crown rests on a purple velvet cushion, with a rolled newspaper tucked underneath bearing the headline 'The Goddess Diaries'. A regal announcement awaits.

Some Important Announcements

Hear ye, hear ye! There are some big changes coming to the kingdom of Ten Shades & Me.

Hey Lovelies,

I’ve been thinking about our blog and the direction that things are going in lately and I wanted to write a quick newsie, so that you’re not taken by surprise. Ten Shades & Me has always been a reflection of who we are, and as we’ve grown and changed, it’s only natural that the blog should grow and change with us.

Here is a breakdown of the changes you can expect to see on Ten Shades & Me:

1. Not Just Kink, But Relationships

When Ten Shades & Me started back in 2014, our focus was on kink education. Yet, as time has progressed, Ten Shades & Me has grown and we’ve explored polyamory and sex toy testing, so we want to focus on relationships and kink as a whole — we’re not abandoning our goal, we’re evolving it. Our primary focus is and will always be on accessible and affordable intimacy for people with disabilities and health conditions, but of course we want all and anyone to feel as though they can benefit from our work!

2. Embracing The Switch

When I started BDSM in 2006, I was a Domme, and I had a sub. He left me suddenly (and through no fault of my own) in 2009, and I was so heartbroken that I decided to “hang my boots up”. He did try to come back to me later, but by then, I was already submissive myself.

More than ten years later, however, I have discovered that I may not be fully submissive either — I am a Switch, and I can be Dominant or submissive, depending on who I’m with. I’m not “conventionally Dominant” — I’m not into pegging and whipping and strutting around in high heels — but loving Dominance, spanking, tickling, teasing, mind games and orgasm control? I love all that stuff!

3. Renaming “The Submissive Diaries”

This is probably the biggest change you’ll see: they’ll no longer will they be “The Submissive Diaries” but “The Goddess Diaries” instead. This is about stepping into my inner power and value to the community. It’s also about respecting myself as a Switch.

Also, a lot of the men that I’ve associated with over the years like to think me a Queen or a Goddess (including Master Levi, who was the first to call me Queen Elena). I might as well acknowledge that, right?

“A Goddess, to be worshipped by all.”

— Preaching To The Perverted, 1997

4. I’m Closing Down Queen Elena

That’s everything for now. Which change are you most excited about? Let me know in the comments below!

Until next time,

Take care & have fun!

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